Second Amendment Guarantees My Right to Keep and Bear Killer Robots
The Second Amendment is under attack by people who claim they only want background checks for buying homicidal kill-bots, but don’t be fooled. They’re coming to take our homicidal kill-bots away.
The rights of law-abiding Americans to protect ourselves with lethal cyborgs was enshrined in the U.S. Constitution, a perfect, near-holy document that has only been amended twenty-seven times. The Supreme Court has ruled that the Second Amendment’s “well-regulated militia” was just another way of saying, “AI-driven autonomous assault drone.”
Supreme Court Justices understand that when the government has an army of mechanized soldiers, every citizen needs a mechanized army of their own. Otherwise, we risk having our freedoms taken away by a tyrannical government. Instead, our liberties are protected by an all-powerful machine consciousness controlling invincible legions of armored murder-droids, as the Founding Fathers intended.
The number of automaton mass-shootings has skyrocketed in recent years, as more people are instructing their deadly appliances to execute everyone around them. This only highlights the need for heavily armed robotic guards everywhere at all times, so we’re protected during the ensuing firestorms of exploding ordinances.
States that have “Stand your Ground” laws have extended them to sentient machines, which are programmed to annihilate perceived enemies before anyone realizes the device has used a thermal canon to roast an innocent bystander — in self-defense, of course.
0 Comments