What Not To Do Or Say To Disabled People
I forgot how exhausting being disabled in a small town can be.
I love living in a small town most days. The slower pace, the quiet. I love the fact that most things are closed on weekends. It can be a bit of a challenge sometimes but the rest of the time it helps me stay present instead of days zooming by.
I feel more at home here than I have anywhere else.
But that doesn’t mean it’s easy to live here.
I am still finding doors I don’t fit through with my walker, short timed cross walks — and my least favourite stupidity.
Stupidity can look like a lot of different things to a lot of different people.
I have reserved that word for people that clap at me for walking and going about my daily life, or people that congratulate me for walking and doing my day to day life. Like somehow walking is some how extraordinary because I am disabled.
Kiddo and I made our way to the mall to pick up a few things at our local dollar store. This is where we ran into this person who thought it was okay to congratulate me.
I know they don’t mean any harm by it but being on the receiving end of it is frustrating.
Disabled don’t want to be congratulated or told how well they do for living their life.
If you want to talk to us, try hello. How are you? Anything but congratulations. We’re not doing anything other than trying to live in a world that would rather we not exist.
But we exist and we’re tired.
We’re tired of being told we’re not welcome.
We’re tired of being told not to take up space.
Not to demand access.
Being forced to survive on scraps.
If you see a disabled person out and about living. Smile. Say hi. Say nice day isn’t it?
If the words congratulations, or the urge to clap feel like an appropriate response. Know that it’s not. Nor anything else you wouldn’t do for your own daughter, son, or have someone do for you.
Disabled people are people. Treat them the same way you treat non disabled people.
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