“This Isn’t Working Out. You’re Too Nice.”
Let me tell you the story about my friend, Kamal*. Kamal is a great guy. In fact, I would go so far as to say that he is one of the kindest, gentlest human beings on the planet. He’s the type of guy that moms want to see their daughters date
As it turns out, this can be a problem for the poor dude.
Unlike Nice Guys (TM) who are just fake-polite until they get laid, Kamal is actually genuinely caring. He has boundaries of his own, he doesn’t lie about what he likes, but he does try to pull out all the stops for the woman he likes.
As it turns out, this actually does seem to be an Achille’s heel of sorts when it comes to his dating life. Kamal tends to attract women who are, for lack of a better term, toxic and stuck in that toxic mindset.
The most recent one seemed promising. Kamal treated her well — very well, in fact. We’re talking fancy dinner dates, always was willing to lend an ear, but unlike fake-nice guys, he also had a spine. He had no problem telling her when he was tapped out of funds or when he wasn’t in the mood for sex.
It seemed like such a healthy relationship…until it got toxic. First, it started with her making “sideways” comments about him. Then it turned into her trying to actively pick fights with him.
Eventually, he asked her what was wrong and why it seemed like she just wanted to shake him. She broke down and said, “I can’t do this anymore. This isn’t working out. You’re too nice.”
Too nice? Is that a thing? Either way, she left him and revealed that she was cheating on him. Her next relationship, from what I heard, ended with a DV charge.
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